Confused by the title of this post? Well, those are two of the cd's I listened to this week during my drives to work and home. The third pick was Billy Joel's Greatest Hits, but I actually never even put that one into the player. Why, you ask?
Well, to me, music is a HUGE part of my life, and many events can be brought back from the farthest reaches of my brain with just a song or two. This is what happened this week. I was in grade school when "The Wall" was released, but I never really listened to it until I was out of high school, married, and having some problems with depression. This cd, which is the soundtrack to the movie of the same name, spoke to me on many levels. For those of you who don't know, the basic story is a Rock Star who succumbs to depression and builds "a wall" around his emotions so he will not be hurt anymore by the people who he thought loved him... and then the breaking down of that wall, leading to a mental breakdown and schizophrenic episodes.
OK, so I was nowhere near that point, but the haunting lyrics and music spoke to me back then. Now, many years later, I still enjoy the cd, but when I played it this week, I was transported back to the late 80's and early 90's. I drove home in a bit of a daze, the music filled my brain with many memories, both good and bad. BUT, that is the good part...they are now just memories of events that made me who I am today.
The cd "Pretty Hate Machine" by Nine Inch Nails is a set of songs in which Trent Reznor (the main band member) is dealing with a failing relationship and the manic feelings that go along with it. Anger, Lust, Self doubt, lashing out.... all of it. We have all been there. This CD was my therapy during my divorce! Many memories here, too, as one can imagine.
These are, and have been for many years, a couple of my treasured cd's in my collection. I am not usually one to reminisce like this, dredging up painful memories and such. Music is usually uplifting to me, which is why I listened to so much of it during the low points in my life. But sometimes the melodies actually haunt me.